Share this page
Empty nest syndrome is the feeling of loss or sadness when your kids leave home or move out to start a new family.
It’s a complex feeling. On one hand you are happy for your children. They have grown up and are learning to take care of themselves. On the other hand, you feel sad and lost when they move away from you.
The empty nest syndrome can be experienced by both parents but mothers are usually more affected by it. This is because many mothers have dedicated their lives to raising their kids. They see motherhood as their top priority. Even working mothers experience it. Once her last child moves out, a mother may have to battle feelings of loneliness, worthlessness and disorientation.
Rather than dwell on the grief, prepare for it and seize this chance to take back your life!
First, prepare for the empty nest syndrome. Plan in advance for the day when all your kids will grow up and move out. Come to terms with the potential grief you might feel. Keep a journal and jot down your feelings if it helps.
Draft a list of things you will do “one day” and make today the day to kick start them. Enroll in short courses or even a degree. Make new friends. Take up a new hobby or sign up for volunteer work. Keep up a regular routine such as health care and exercising.
Be aware of your feelings and share them with your partner. Allow yourself to feel upset. Get advice and support from friends and relatives who have gone through this phase in life. Get tips on how to cope. They will be the best people to go to for advice.
Spend time with your partner and enjoy each other’s company without any distractions from the kids. Recreate a home that reflects your own likes and desires without having to consider the needs of your children. Very soon, you will start to enjoy the empty nest experience.
The empty nest period can actually be an exciting period of your life after years of devoting your life to your kids. Your life becomes your own again. The empty nest marks the beginning of yet another adventure in your life.
Finally, if you find it hard to cope with the change, seek professional help and counseling.
Adapted from an article first published on Marriage Central website.
Tags: Empty Nester /Growing your relationship /Intimacy
As your kids grow up and become independent, you and your spouse should begin to switch gears from just being parents, to being a couple again.
Retirement could lead to a new beginning in your marriage. Now that you have the time, make a commitment to rekindle the love you first felt for each other.
The mid-life crisis may be a tough patch as physical signs of ageing become more apparent and the kids withdraw into their respective worlds. Here’s how you and your better half can help each other navigate this season of life and renew your love at the same time.
Retirement can be a positive time in your life when you can look forward to growing and rediscovering yourself through new activities and interests.