Families For Life | Are we ready to start a family?

Having a baby can be a wonderful blessing, albeit a permanent one. There’s no money-back—or time-back—guarantee if you’re not satisfied with the parenthood experience. So, it goes without saying that deciding whether you’re ready to become parents is a big decision that should be taken seriously.

Thankfully, you’re not on your own here. We have prepared a list of questions you can ask yourselves to find out where you stand on this new journey of parenthood!

1. Is this something we both want?

Perhaps the most important question for any couple: Do we want kids? Not because our parents or relatives expect it, but because we truly do. Communicate openly and honestly; you should both be on the same page. If you realise your answers differ, revisit the conversation later and avoid pressuring or forcing your partner into a decision. A great way to assess your relationship’s readiness for a major life change is by taking Our Journey Marriage Quiz!

2. Are we willing to sacrifice our time?

Having a baby is a full-time job—on top of your actual jobs. Suffice to say, binge-watching your favourite shows all day on weekends or freely pursuing hobbies may no longer be an option, especially during the child’s early years. If you're ready for this new chapter, be sure to plan ahead and set aside time for yourselves and each other after the baby arrives.

3. Would money be an issue?

Being financially prepared for a baby is crucial, as costs can add up quickly. From gynaecology appointments and delivery costs to essentials like diapers and milk powder, you’ll likely need to adjust your budget. If you need help managing your finances, here’s an article for practical tips to get you started.

4. Do we have childcare arrangements?

It’s common to be a dual-income couple in this current economic climate. If both of you want to return to the workforce after your maternity and paternity leaves have been used up, ensure that you have a childcare plan in place. While grandparents often enjoy helping out, this may not always be an option. Keep in mind that enrolling your child in infant care or hiring a nanny will come with additional costs.

5. Are we okay with putting our careers on hold?

Your priorities will shift once you become parents. Staying late at the office to chase a promotion may no longer be ideal. If alternative childcare arrangements aren’t possible, one of you may need to pause your career to care for your newborn. Be sure you’re both comfortable with this possibility without feelings of resentment.

6. Will we be a team?

As parents, you're partners in a shared journey; you work best as a unit. Your discipline and parenting styles should complement each other. Discuss, compromise, and find a shared approach that works for both of you. The “good cop, bad cop” dynamic can create confusion and cause distance with your child, so present a united front and always have each other’s backs.

It’s easy to feel pressured to start a family, especially when parents or relatives keep bringing it up. But the most important thing you can do—whether you choose to have a child or not—is to make a well-considered decision and ensure that you and your partner are on the same page.