Families For Life | Connecting with your in-laws through family bonding
Connecting with our own parents can already take a lifetime. So, what about when it comes to connecting with your partner’s parents? They may come from different backgrounds, have different habits, and sometimes have different opinions on things you believe in.
When you look past those differences, though, you’ll find that there are many similarities that you share. All it takes is some humour, a little patience, and perhaps these tips to build a relationship with them that lasts.
Cook up a good time together
Family recipes are some of the most delicious ones, and bonding over them in the kitchen with your in-laws (and your kids if you don’t mind the mess) is priceless when it comes to connecting with them. They might have a signature dish that you never knew existed, or you could look for a new recipe to try out together. Expect a lot of conversations, great memories, and delicious flavours. What’s more, food is a huge love language too!
Recognise they are parents too
Remember that your in-laws are also your partner’s parents. They were closest to him or her growing up, and now that you are probably the most important person in your partner’s life, it’s important to recognise your in-laws’ relationship with your partner. Learn about their parenthood (and your partner’s childhood) through funny stories, talking about the past and looking at old photos. They are great ways to deepen your relationship with them and your knowledge about your partner’s history as well!
Create a new family bonding ritual
Your in-laws’ family might have had meaningful family rituals that they treasured growing up. These rituals create shared memories, foster relationships, and preserve values and traditions. Be sure to recognise them, but why not create new ones of your own? Recurring activities, such as a monthly family dinner at a special location, volunteering together, karaoke night, or games like bingo that everyone plays together on Sunday, are just a few things you can plan with your family, your in-laws and their extended family.
Jalan-jalan as a family
A day out with the family and your in-laws doesn’t have to be a grand excursion. A stroll at the beach and a picnic, exploring your neighbourhood together, and walking through the parks are not only good ways to connect without distractions, but also a great way to stay fit together. If you run out of ideas, checking out our family-friendly events is a great idea as well!
Treat them like your Ma and Pa too
Most of us here address our in-laws in the same way we address our parents, so it’s okay to treat them as such, too. Asking them for advice, just like a child would to their parents, can initiate a strong bond. Whether it’s an issue at work or a challenge you are facing, simply reaching out and asking for their help builds trust and helps you connect with them on a more personal and familial level.
Bond over family celebrations
Whether it’s decorating for Deepavali, wrapping ketupat for Hari Raya, or baking pineapple tarts for Chinese New Year, showing interest in their traditions is a huge show of respect. It also shows that you sincerely want to be part of their family traditions. Plus, celebrations always create a great atmosphere for the whole family to bond over!
The most important thing to remember is that although bonding doesn’t happen overnight, nurturing your relationship with your in-laws through small, consistent actions and connections can become one of the most enriching parts of your family life!
Resources:
https://familiesforlife.sg/pages/Activity/5-Activities-for-Extended-Families-to-Build-Closer-Ties