Families For Life | The art of being good in-laws

Meaningful relationships take a lot of work! If you’re feeling stressed about your relationship with your new son- or daughter-in-law, don’t worry, you’re not alone. With time, patience, hard work and dedication, you can build strong bonds with each other.

Here’s a guide to help you build a strong relationship with your child’s spouse and be awesome in-laws!

Let’s start with an open mind!

The first step to building a great relationship is acceptance. As parents, we want what’s best for our children. Sometimes that means setting standards that might come across as too high, impractical, or even intrusive. Keep in mind that your children are individuals who deserve the right to choose their partner for life! Practise an open mind and respect their opinions, even if you disagree.

If something bothers you, always be open to discussions but be willing to take a step back if they insist on doing things their way. More importantly, be there for them no matter the outcome.

Once you’ve accepted your child’s independence and their chosen partner, it will be easier for you to open up to your child’s spouse and kickstart a great relationship!

Overcome obstacles with diplomacy

Nobody is perfect! Everyone has quirks or habits that might not sit well with others. If you are annoyed by something your son- or daughter-in-law has done, you can bring it up in private with your child or their partner.

Good communication is key in this situation. As you bring up your concerns to them, remember to be polite, calm, and logical. Try to find a solution together and be open to a compromise if necessary.

While these moments can be tense and frustrating, this is a crucial step to building your relationship with your son- or daughter-in-law. By overcoming obstacles together, you can remove a potential conflict in your relationship while reinforcing the bond between all of you.

Take your time with it

Positive relationships need time to grow. Your first meeting with your son- or daughter-in-law only gives you a first impression. Go the extra mile to get to know them more. Invite them for dinner or plan family activities together! At the same time, ensure that you’re giving your child and their spouse space to grow and refrain from imposing restrictions. It can be tricky to balance distance and affection but do your best and you can increase their confidence in your role as a mother- or father-in-law. They’ll see your efforts and reciprocate in kind!

At the end of the day, your in-laws are simply new members of the family who need time to get used to the flock. With time, effort, love, and care on both sides, you’ll be on your way to building strong bonds that last.