Families For Life | New Baby: Helping Toddlers and Preschoolers Adjust-Young Children
Welcoming a new baby is an exciting time for the family. However, your child may have mixed feelings about becoming a big brother or sister. They may feel excited, curious, worried, or even jealous. These emotions are normal as they adjust to a big change in their lives.
Help Your Child Understand What's Happening
Talk about the baby in simple, age-appropriate ways. Reassure your child that the new baby is joining the family, not replacing them.
You can say:
"We will always love you, and there is enough love in our family for everyone."
Reading books about becoming a big sibling can also help prepare them for the baby's arrival.
Involve Them in Baby Preparations
Help your child feel included by giving them small jobs, such as:
Choosing a toy or blanket for the baby.
Helping to organise baby clothes.
Packing a small item for the hospital bag.
Being involved helps children feel important and valued.
Teach Them About Babies
Young children may expect a new sibling to be an instant playmate. Explain that babies need lots of care because they are still learning and growing.
Look at your child's baby photos and remind them that they were once a baby too. If possible, visit friends or relatives with a newborn so they can see what babies are like.
Celebrate Their Role as a Big Sibling
Help your child feel proud of their new role. Explain that they can:
Teach the baby new things.
Sing songs to the baby.
Show the baby how to play when they are older.
Talking about positive sibling relationships can help your child look forward to having a brother or sister.
Keep Routines Familiar
Maintaining regular mealtimes, bedtime routines, and playtime helps children feel secure when many things are changing around them.
Spend Special Time Together
Set aside one-on-one time with your child each day, even if it is only for a few minutes. Reading a story, playing a game, or taking a short walk together reminds them that they are still special and loved.
Encourage Your Child to Talk About Their Feelings
Let your child know it is okay to share their feelings. Encourage them to use simple phrases such as:
"I feel sad."
"I need a hug."
"Can I have some time with you?"
When children feel heard and understood, they are better able to cope with change.
Watch for Signs They Need Extra Support
Some children take longer to adjust. Look out for:
Increased clinginess.
Frequent tantrums.
Returning to behaviours they had outgrown.
Aggressive behaviour towards others.
If these behaviours continue for a long period or become severe, consider seeking advice from a paediatrician or child development professional.
Growing Together as a Family
Adjusting to a new sibling takes time. By preparing your child early, listening to their feelings, and reassuring them of your love, you can help them feel secure and confident in their new role as a big brother or big sister. With patience and support, many children go on to build a close and rewarding relationship with their sibling.
